Trip down memory lane.. and into a curious mind...

I love to blog, but I seem to always run into a technical difficulty, such as the other night when it just wouldn't post and ended up closing. So lame. On the occasion that I take the time and it does actually post, my blog is usually one of random thoughts. I've begun to wonder if it's worth reading. I mean, I could continue to blog for my own entertainment, but I apologize if it is not entertaining to you. If you want entertaining, I know a boy who blogs about as often as I do and his is rather quirky - thought it is about a band... This is just about me... Anyway, enough of that.

So once again, my parents are moving. As usual this calls for the packing and "re-packing" of old memories, keepsakes and books - the only things I really have left at my parents house. Most of this was already in boxes, waiting for a time when I have more space of my own. But this weekend I sorted through all of it again.

Some of the things I held so dear to my heart in high school, seem completely useless and unimportant now. Other things I couldn't get rid of because it oddly seemed wrong, and yet I have no use for it other than to put it in a box.. Like my cheerleading uniform from junior high. What use is that? But who else would want it? I dont know. There were some interesting things to rediscover - like old love letters. When I was a freshman in high school I dated a junior. As this was a time before text messaging, note passing was still ever popular. In fact, this boyfriend of mine would type notes to me at home, after talking to me on the phone, and give them to me at school the next day. I don't know why I kept these (they were trashed this weekend..), but it put a small smile on my face when I read the notes that said nothing. I'm sure I was really excited to read it when I was 15, but now it just echoes the past empty conversations in shallow relationships. Hmm the joys of dating in high school :) Aside from that there were a few proclamations of desperate love from others.. only a few... but still fun to read.

I also read through a few assignments I kept from junior high, which actually made me cringe as I read them. They were terrible. Ok, my reports were good. I was a decent writer. But when writing anything personal, well, I just lost all creative writing expertise. I hope my writing now is not so awful, if so, divert your eyes immediately! But as for my old English teachers.. well bravo to them for bearing through!

As I left home yesterday, I left three boxes of mementos. A few boxes of toys and kids books that my parents will one day let me kids play with, and a house that I may never see again. Oddly enough, I'm only sad that I can't help my parents move - only because it is a lot of work and they need the help. But I really won't miss the house. Probably something to do with moving somewhere around 25 times in my lifetime...

Well, I'm off to a Texas Baptist Media Forum - because that's what writers do.. Or at least Baptist writers? I don't know. It's just to give me some direction for the future, if possible :)

Go listen to Matt Costa.
His music will make you happy.
Or.. you could always listen to some more sleeperstar, as I know you constantly have it on repeat. ;)

Love God, Love people.

New Year...

I recently became reacquainted with an old friend... Hard to explain, but in this process I told this dear girl some of my past, and well, let's just say it didn't sound too pretty on my ears. I think everyone regrets something from the past, but I regret a lot. There is really nothing I can do to change the past, but in talking to her and with the start of a new year, I realized that I can continue to change my future. I made a lot of excuses for what I've done in the past, but here is the truth of it - I screwed up a lot and in some ways I'm a better person for it. In other ways, I'll just make sure to not make the same mistakes again...

So this new year has begun with some musings of the past and thoughts on the future.

This is the year I graduate from college. May 17th to be exact. I'll receive my diploma and jump to another stepping stone. The question now is - which stepping stone? May keeps approaching, yet each day just brings less clarity. I could be a bum, I could move to Latin America/NYC/Spain/Anywhere, I could work in PR, I could find a writing job, I could travel endlessly, I could go to grad school, I could stay and work in Waco, I really could do anything... My options are endless. How exciting! And how very, very frightening.

Besides life-altering decisions, this year also has promise...
Promise that I will reach my goal of graduating, promise that I will see some of my dearest friends married and happily in love, promise that I will see new children in the arms of other friends, promise that my God is forever great, promise that there is a plan for my life, promise that my parents house will sell.. promises are hiding at every corner, waiting to be discovered :)

A new year also holds new beginnings.
I have a new favorite band: Sleeperstar.
I also have a new boyfriend who sings and plays the keyboard in this band. He's amazing.
After May I'll begin a new stage of life (as mentioned earlier).
New friendships are developing everyday - that's exciting.
And there are millions of new things to come.. most I'll never expect, but I'm excited to experience.

So here's to a new year and new beginnings. Let's leave the past in the past and look forward to an exciting time in 2008.

Happy New Year Friends :)